INT. MALL OF AMERICA - ARENA AREA - DAY

 

Bianca Diaz and Colin McRae are back at their desk, slightly wary but keeping the energy up for the sake of the fans.

 

 

Bianca: Welcome Welcome WELCOME! To the 2025 W2. I'm Bianca Diaz.

 

Colin: And I'm Colin McRae. We're on Day 6, which means today will be the halfway mark in this adventure.

 

Bianca: And what an adventure it's been, Colin. Just yesterday alone, Lily Martin sold out to Zora Luthor and Ann Lee aligned herself with Rade. Daria Donner reconnected with her darkness and Morgan Maverick. We're sure to see the fallout of all that today. And sure enough, here comes Leila Blake now.

 

 

Leila: Is everyone having a good time?

 

Crowd cheers.

 

Leila: Happy to hear it.  I wish that I was here to celebrate with you all, but there have been some incidents that we need to discuss. In the course of these past 5 days, we have seen some drastic betrayals of our company. Ann Lee and Lily Martin can no longer be trusted to lead the charge with impartiality. So with that in mind I have hired two new staff. 

 

 

Leila: Please everyone give a hand for referee Andra Jones and interviewer Cristel Bassano! Irving Barth will occasionally fill in for interviewing and as needed, but we are happy to have these expatriates from Eastern Kaos Wrestling now joining our ranks. 

 

The crowd cheers but this brings out former Eastern Kaos president Baz McCobb. 

 

 

Baz: Leila Blake. I see you've finally decided to finally hire some useful staff. I was just about to lose faith in you completely. When I agreed to this merger, I expected that this would be exemplary for all involved. 

 

Leila: From where I'm standing, Baz, it's your wrestlers that are causing the issues. 

 

Baz: And yet, they caused me no problems somehow. Interesting, that. 

 

Leila: Are you saying you can do a better job than me? Because you sold me your company. No refunds.

 

Baz: I'm not looking to buy my company back. I'm looking to run your company. I want the whole show. You can be my EVP.

 

This brings out former Ride the Waves CEO Marvin Patel. 

 

 

Marvin: Are we talking about a takeover? I have been watching from the house I bought with how much money you have had to pay me to make me consider this and I am now wishing I asked for more. What is happening with my wrestlers, Leila.

 

Leila: Well, two of them are our tag champions, so at least they're doing well. 

 

Marvin: And then this monster man goes around and destroys everyone.

 

Leila: He's not staying-

 

Marvin: Honestly neither should you. At least not as the leader of this. I would like to throw my name in to take your place.

 

And now, former Ring the Belle CEO Elisa Mae He comes out.

 

 

Elisa Mae: I know y'all aren't tryin' to leave li'l ol' me outta this conversation. Now, Leila honey, I was so excited to see you takin' on the world, I was like yeehaw girlboss, but I think ya took on more than you can chew. And I too wanna get back on top where I belong.

 

Bianca: Is this merger falling apart already? 

 

Colin: It looks like it's a hostile takeover. Or at least the start of one. 

 

Leila: Look, everyone, I know this hasn't been a swimming start but we can all agree that growing pains are a necessary part of growing. So I can hire you all to be on the board as my executive team and we can work together-

 

Baz: I like the board idea, but I don't think you should be at the forefront. 

 

Marvin: No, I agree with Baz. Yes, the four of us working together is a good idea, BUT leadership needs to be decided and not just assumed.

 

Elisa Mae: Wait, y'all, we're a wrasslin fed here, easy solution, fatal four-way. Whichever of us wins gets control. And don't worry your sweet little head Leila, we'll keep the name, it's all over the brandin' of everything. At least for now.

 

Marvin: But who will referee? Obviously your Lily Martin isn't up to the task of a fair and even fight, and your Andra Jones would be too invested in keeping her old boss, so how do we do this evenly?

 

Baz: We'll just have to bring in someone who doesn't have history with any of us. 

 

Leila: Okay. I guess we're doing this. Day 12 we see who gets control of the company, and who sits on the board. 

 

Bianca: We're going to have a CEO Throwdown! And a special referee! This keeps getting crazier and crazier!

 

Colin: And we haven't even started today off yet. 

 

Bianca: We should probably do that, right? Before things get any more nutso?

 

Colin: Let's throw it on down to Ash Greaves for our pre-show match. Ash?

 

PRE-SHOW MATCH: DARIA DONNER AND MORGAN MAVERICK w/ZORA LUTHOR VS EMMA JANEER AND KALPANA

 

Ash Greaves stands in the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following tag-team contest is scheduled for one fall!

 

Halestorm "Dirty Work" plays as Daria Donner, Morgan Maverick, and Zora Luthor walk out, flaunting themselves and flipping off the fans.

 

 

Ash: First, accompanied by Zora Luthor, the team of "Delaware Devil" Daria Donner and "Philly Phirebrand" Morgan Maverick, the NorEaster!

 

The lights go blue and sparkly, the instrumental version of "Going the Distance" from Hercules plays and the tron around Emma shows the Cinderella castle with fireworks in the tron. Emma sashays in. She puts the Minnie glasses on a fan and waves to the crowd as she enters the ring. She leans against a turnbuckle and winks at the crowd.

 

 

Ash: And their opponents! First, From Celebration, Florida, the Powerslam Princess, EMMA JANEER!

 

Zora Luthor has a microphone in her hand.

 

Zora: Very nice, very demure. Now Emma, before your partner comes out here, we have an offer for you.

 

Emma is handed a mic. 

 

Emma: Not interested. 

 

Zora: Now hold on, hold on. Yesterday I demonstrated to you that good always wins is a naive little fantasy for children when I bought my victory against you. You're not playing dolls anymore, you're in the real world, and the only way to get power is connection. What has this friendship with Kalpana gotten you exactly?

 

Emma: An ally.

 

Zora: An ally! And has she actually helped you win? Has she gotten you any closer to gold or success? Emma, you're about to start a brand new journey at Path. Are you going to go there with hugs and kisses and doodles and trying to be everyone's friend or are you going to go there to win? Now before you answer that, listen, I know that in a week's time, you'll be on a plane trying to make your way as a jobber, so our time in the same ring...well, it's short. So I can't offer you too much. What I CAN offer you is success while you're here. Protection. And, to sweeten the deal-

 

Zora holds up two shiny keys.

 

Zora: I can offer you a crap ton of money, a fancy new Maserati, and a 6th floor penthouse suite on 5th Ave New York. Someplace luxurious. And let's be honest, both Kalpana and Daria are also going to Path, and Daria's latched onto her killer instinct while Kalpana is playing Legos with her moveset. Which rocket do you want to be strapped to, the one riding herself into the ground because she made the controls too complicated or the one that's taking off at all costs? Are you a kid or an adult? Do you care more about the power of friendship or the power of power?

 

Sparkle "Freedom" plays as Kalpana comes down to the ramp. She forgoes the theatrics and power-walks down and makes it into the ring.

 

 

Ash: And her partner, from Inaruwa, Nepal, the Innovator of Inaruwa, KALPANA!

 

Emma looks at Kalpana. Then she looks back at Zora Luthor. Then she looks back at Kalpana.

 

Emma: I choose power.

 

Colin: Emma CLOTHESLINES KALPANA OUT OF THE RING! Emma throws Kalpana into the steps! Emma picking Kalpana up off the ground and a DEADLIFT DOMINATOR! Andra is calling for a no contest!

 

The match is declared a no-contest.

 

Colin: Emma rolls Kalpana into the ring...Morgan offering Emma lipstick and she takes out the space buns and puts it on!

 

 

Bianca: Emma tells Morgan and Daria to lift Kalpana up, they do...Emma plants a kiss on Kalpana's forehead! Just leaving the mark there. And now the four of them lift Kalpana up! FOUR PERSON POWERBOMB! I think they're calling this the 4Play at this point, and whatever it is, it just wrecked Kalpana! Emma Janeer raises her hands with the others, and I think she just joined the NorEaster! Andra Jones telling them to get out of the ring. She does not want to be dealing with this nonsense on Day 1, Colin.

 

Colin: And certainly not, but Daria and Zora reminding her that their match is next and Andra lets those two stay. She sighs and nods at Ash  as Day 6 officially begins.

 

W2 DAY 6

Ash: the following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin! In this corner, from Wall Street, Zora Luthor! And in this corner, from Rehoboth, Delaware, Daria Donner!

 

The bell rings. Zora boots Daria, Daria falls down dramatically, Zora puts her foot on her. Andra sighs again and counts.

1!

2!

3!

 

Zora Luthor wins by Pinfall with the Boot.

 

 

Ash: And here is your winner and awarded three points, Zora Luthor.

 

Zora and Daria laugh and hug each other as "Rich" by Yeah Yeah Yeahs plays. They leave laughing at the audience.

 

Bianca: The NorEaster just making an absolute mockery of this whole event.

 

Colin: Andra Jones deserves better than this. 

 

Bianca: Leila Blake deserves better than this. The fans deserve better than this. Absolutely atrocious behavior.

 

Colin: I hope that we can have an easier day going forward. Ash take us to our next match please.

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

The Lights Go completely Out, then a Single Spotlight hits the Stage. Nightwish "Phantom of the Opera" cues up and Tragedeigh sweeps her arms up as if conducting the crescendo. The fans sing along. The spotlight follows her down the ramp as she keeps her arms open. She enters the ring and bows sweeping. The lights come on at this time.

 

 

Ash: First! From Edina, Minnesota, the Gen Z Dramaturge, TRAGEDEIGH!

 

The lights flash green and yellow, as the guitar riff of The Go! Team "Junior Kickstart" begins. Once the brass hits HAZEL CLARKE runs out to loud cheers. She does a jumping split in mid air as yellow and green fireworks go off. She takes off towards the ring at full speed and then uses the momentum to do the same jumping split over the apron and ropes into the ring, culminating in a split and pointing upwards.

 

 

Ash: And her opponent, from Port Maria, Jamaica, the Port Maria Platypus, HAAAAAZEL CLARKE!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: And Clarke is back for her second go! It will be interesting to see if Tragedeigh can get a better handle on Hazel. Hazel throws Tragedeigh across the ropes and Tragedeigh coming back around, Hazel with the leapover, rebound and hurricanrana by Clarke! Tragedeigh hits the ground but keeps the momentum going to get back on her feet and rocket kick now by Clarke! 

 

Bianca: Clarke gets the energy going to the crowd and over to a handstand spinning kick! Clarke bringing in some of her capoeira training, and she's able to get Tragedeigh backed into a corner. Clarke with some quick middle kicks in the corner and puts Tragedeigh up on the turnbuckle and trying for a Headscissors but Tragedeigh escapes to the apron and Clarke hits all turnbuckle! That was all filler no killer!

 

Colin: Tragedeigh with a springboard pirouette kick now and gets a spinning toe hold on Clarke, not a good move to keep one of Clarke's legs free as she goes for the enziguiri - NO! Tragedeigh ducks and holds Clarke in an ankle lock now but flip kick out of it, Clarke causes Tragedeigh to tumble back a titch and handspring back elbow CAUGHT INTO A HALF NELSON SLAM! Tragedeigh bows gracefully and somersault senton! A curtsy and a standing moonsault! Sways back, and corkscrew splash! For the cover!

 

1!

2!

 

Bianca: Clarke gets the shoulder up! Clarke with an armbar now and Tragedeigh rolls out of it fairly easily. Let's see if Tragedeigh can ward off these kicks the same though, it seems like she's once again finding herself backed into a corner, part of which is Clarke's legs are just too fast! Tragedeigh attempts to sweep but Clarke evades with a spinaroony! Comes up with a headscissors whip! Tragedeigh skidding a little on the ground, Clarke looking for the Trouble in Paradise WHOA Tragedeigh ducks it and off the ropes, running flipping it's an OVERTURE! 

 

Colin: Tragedeigh up to the top...Defying Gravity! It's over for Clarke!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Tragedeigh wins by Pinfall with Defying Gravity!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, TRAGEDEIGH!

 

Bianca: Tragedeigh strikes again! 

 

Tragedeigh bows dramatically and exits.

 

Colin: Exit stage right. Well, Clarke got a win in yesterday but it looks like the fighters are already used to her. 

 

INT. MALL FLOOR - CONCURRENT

 

TAYLOR TEKK and CINDY SWEET get up from their massage chairs.

 

 

Cindy: Alright, just in time, your match is about to start.

 

Taylor: ...we didn't do any training today.

 

Cindy: Yeah. After your loss yesterday, I figured that I sent you in too beat up already. It made for an easy defeat. So today, I wanted to give you a very relaxing environment. 

 

Taylor: Have you considered that maybe I'm just not cut out for this ring thing?

 

Cindy: Don't be silly! We had that win-

 

Taylor: That was all you.

 

Cindy: No, you got some moves in. Hey! Don't lose hope. I got your back, even if I can't be out there. 

 

Taylor: Yeah. Okay. 

 

Taylor breathes. He's not entirely confident, but he nods. 

 

Cindy: Go get im champ.

 

MAWL ARENA - CONTINUOUS

 

Colin and Bianca sit in the ring.

 

 

Bianca: And we're back for the first match of the men's division for Day 6. Taylor Tekk is pretty deep in the hole and could really use this win.

 

Colin: You can see that Cindy Sweet is trying everything to get him up and moving. Yesterday she worked him out up until his match, today she's trying to get him in a relaxed and loose state.

 

Bianca: It really seems she wants this more than he does. 

 

Colin: When you invest in a team, you want the team to succeed. It's like if you get a supporting actress for this I'd be cheering for you.

 

Bianca: Wait, why would I be the one getting supporting?

 

Colin: Let's send it down to Ash.

 

Bianca: This isn't over, McRae.

 

Ash is in the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

A man in a Crash Test themed suit with crash test symbol face paint and crash helmet, and carrying a dummy as Primitives “Crash” plays. This is “Crash Course” Craig Convery who runs to the ring while shaking the dummy and then running headfirst into the ring apron, acting dazed, and then telling the dummy to wait for him before getting into the ring.

 

 

Ash: First, from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 211 pounds, Crash Course Craig Convery!

 

Bianca: Okay, yeah, I don't think this is the match that Taylor is going to start getting his groove back?

 

Next is Taylor Tekk who comes out in a lab coat to “The Scientist” by Dandy Warhols and waves to the crowd as he walks in the ring. His hesitance is apparent.

 

 

Ash: And his opponent! From San Diego, California, weighing in at 195 pounds, the Modern Magician, Taylor Tekk!

 

The bell rings. Taylor breathes.

 

Bianca: Order vs Chaos, who will win? Well, there Convery goes with the running headbutt and okay! Taylor catches him into a knee strike and Taylor off the ropes to a swinging neckbreaker. Crash Course easily takes the bump and bounces back up. Course running off the ropes and arm wringer flip by Taylor! Taylor applying the Fujiwara Armbar and Convery kips up with no problem and enziguiri. Taylor rolls back, Taylor and Convery trading arm drags, Convery from the floor BITING Tekk's fingers!

 

Colin: That's a way to break a chain and a takedown by Convery and a hard level of fists alternating left and right, Convery positively rabid now! Convery with headbutts to Taylor, open hand chops down into the chest area and double axe handles to the chest is he giving him CPR? 

 

Bianca: Waistlock suplexes by Convery now and he's just decimating Taylor! Gutwrench powerbomb! Tekk needs to get up, and trying to get over to the ropes. Here comes Convery with the baseball slide and Taylor moves out of the way. Convery can't stop the momentum and out he goes. Taylor trying to catch his breath.

 

1!

 

Colin: Tekk's only chance of beating Convery is to be able to quickly assess and re-assess. And that's not a knock on Tekk, that's just dealing with Crash Course. Convery pacing around a bit outside, I think he's trying to get Tekk to dive after him.

 

2!

 

Bianca: He'd need a braver and/or stupider opponent for that, and now he's getting himself all riled up and the charge back into the ring! Run, Taylor, run!

 

Colin: There's the Head-On! Running Headbutt takes Tekk off his feet, Convery up to the top turnbuckle...he calls his 450 a Bad Idea, and Taylor undoubtedly feeling that's exactly what this match was! Nailed and Convery with the pin.

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Crash Course Craig Convery wins by Pinfall with the Bad Idea 450 Splash!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Crash Course Craig Convery!

 

Bianca: And Cindy Sweet must be losing her mind backstage. She's tried everything. 

 

Colin: Always hard when your partner wants it more than you do.

 

Bianca: Undoubtedly. But let's keep this going. Ash?

 

Ash enters the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and counts towards points in the Round Robin!

 

The arena lights create an effect as if in stained glass. The instrumental version of "CASTLE OF GLASS" by Linkin Park starts to play. The colors in this stained glass effect rotate around the arena. When the drums of the song hit, Perry punches the air three times with quick firework blasts to cheers from the crowd. Perry pounds the fists of some fans as he walks down the ramp, then slams his fist on the apron three times and lets out a scream before sliding in the rings and putting his hands in a square and smashing his head through them.

 

 

Ash: First, From Corning, New York, weighing 246 pounds, "Unrelenting" Perry Payne!

 

The word "DANGER" flashes on the screen. "D is for Dangerous" by Arctic Monkeys plays. Red sirens reflect throughout the room and Dangerous Johnny Dagger stands on the apron, looking down. He stomps and pyro in the shape of a triangle forms around him. He looks up and the triangle pyro explodes outward. He runs at a full sprint towards the ring then without breaking stride slides in. He hits the mat with his fists and lets out a scream, at which time the fans cheer.

 

 

Ash: And his opponent, from Kill Devil Hills, North Carolin, weighing in at 202 pounds, Dangerous Johnny Dagger!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: And Dangerous Johnny Dagger notched his first win in the Round Robin yesterday. But he wasn't too happy about how it happened.

 

Bianca: Dude was pissed. I personally don't get it, a win is a win. 

 

Colin: For someone like Dagger, who prides himself on his intensity and his dangerousness, having to resort to outside interference is insulting. That was with Gilbert Glass, and we're seeing him square off with the other half of that equation now. Dagger ends the grapple with a Falcon Arrow. A big move to start this off, but Dagger doesn't do anything by half. Dagger now with a few quick lefts and off the ropes, jumping forearm shot that Payne reverses to a hip toss! The accuracy it takes to catch someone in the air like that is astounding. 

 

Bianca: Remember, Perry Payne was an inline skater, and when you're constantly on moving ground and doing jumps, accuracy is everything. That skill set has served Perry well in these matches. Payne runs and goes for the elbow drop, and right to the gut of Dagger. Payne goes to the legs and catapults Dagger to the ropes! Dagger rebounding off the ropes into a back cracker by Payne. Payne back off the ropes into a flip kick! Dagger up now and standing dropkick by Dagger! Running off the ropes into a running headscissors! Payne doesn't stay down long, but Dagger catches him with a jumping Polish hammer! 

 

Colin: Gets Payne up into a spinning brainbuster! Dagger is taking control of this match back. Payne goes for a discus lariat but Dagger ducks it and Schoolboy pin!

 

1!

 

Bianca: Payne kicks out and ducks Dagger's back spin kick into a back suplex. Dagger rolls back up and takes the business end of the Discus lariat this time! That one flipped him! Dagger lands on his face. Not a pretty sight. Payne off the ropes and goes for the Akneeler NO Dagger rolled out of the way and back rolls into a run, off the ropes, here comes the Sling Blade, it's a Warning Sign!!

 

Colin: Picking him up, setting for the Spike, we're about to see a Dagger Drop and down Payne goes! Dagger with the cover...

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Dangerous Johnny Dagger wins by Pinfall with the Dagger Drop!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Dangerous Johnny Dagger!

 

Dagger celebrates with the fans as "D is for Dangerous" plays.

 

Colin: Dagger gets the clean win! This one he can feel proud about! 

 

INT. LEILA'S OFFICE - MEANWHILE

 

 

 

Leila: Uh-huh. I see. Yeah, no that makes total sense. But, if we could just...no, you're, you're right. Okay. I'll...I'll let them know.

 

Leila hangs up the phone and sighs. Marvin Patel stands in her doorway with a smirk.

 

 

Marvin: It seems your control continues to be in freefall, Ms. Blake.

 

Leila: Don't you have a surfing competition to bet on from your stately house that I funded?

 

Marvin: Well, when the unrest happens, it is a wave I will gladly be riding on. 

 

Leila sighs again.

 

INT. BACKSTAGE - CONTINUOUS

 

Leila calls a gathering backstage of everyone who was expecting to go to Path.

 

 

Leila: There's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to come out and say it. Path has been watching our W2 and they've decided to sell most of your contracts back to us. 

 

Angry murmurs gather among the crowd.

 

 

Tamara Rivers: Did they say why?

 

Leila: They did, and this was what I was concerned about. While wrestling is meant to be chaotic, the antics by many of you could not be ignored. First and foremost, Rade. Your wanton destruction of your fellow competitors to the point that we've had to sideline and replace two of our solid performers in this event already is a liability they are not willing to take, and honestly I don't blame them. 

 

 

Rade: Per...ish.

 

Ann: You would dare punish someone for feeding themselves?

 

Leila: This wasn't my call to make. Kalpana and Emma. Your bar room and backstage antics while entertaining here is below the expectations of a federation of this caliber, and the draws that you two bring  doesn't match the level of drama that you two bring.

 

 

Emma: Excuse me? What makes me not a draw?

 

Kalpana: Right?

 

Emma: Well, you're not a draw, that's why I dumped you. 

 

Leila: Disney adult doesn't carry as well on a global state. And Kal, I'm sorry to say that innovating moves is only interesting if others aren't also innovating. 

 

Emma: Ha. 

 

Kalpana: Wait, you didn't mention Daria Donner.

 

 

Daria: You're obsessed with me and it's really sad.

 

Leila: Daria...(checks notes, then sheepishly) is still going to Path.

 

Kalpana: Of course she is. Because she's a nepo. 

 

Daria: Or maybe I'm the only interesting one here.

 

Kalpana: You're another blonde who thinks she's bad. Steve stepped in for you, I know it. What you did to Broadway was exactly what Rade did to the others. 

 

Leila: Steve isn't actually aware of most of this, and apparently only had impact on one person here.

 

Kalpana: Called it.

 

Leila: Actually it was Neon Juan.

 

 

Neon Juan: That sonofabitch. What is it that I have done?

 

Leila: He shared that you were a scumbag to some college kids and got into a brawl with him in the mall. He went to the office and suggested your contract be pulled. He didn't have enough pull to outright get you cut, but what's going to happen is he's going to make an appearance here on Day 12 and you're going to have to fight him to get your contract back.

 

Kalpana: OH! Steve is coming here! Well, Daria, I'm sure he's gonna love what you've done to yourself. Yep, I'm sure he's gonna wanna team with this new you. 

 

Daria: Oh no. Oh no no no....

 

Daria panics and leaves.

 

Tamara: What of the rest of us?

 

Leila: Landon, they were unhappy that you weren't upfront about your minstrel needing to be on payroll and that he's been causing problems in the locker room.

 

 

Landon: He does not need to be paid, I ow-

 

Leila: Nope. Kira, now that they're an international fed, an American local weatherwoman isn't that interesting. 

 

 

Kira: This just in, they can kiss my ass.

 

Leila: Tamara, they just say "sorry but we actually just don't know how to fit you into what we're doing currently, let's talk again next year."

 

Tamara: (deflated) Okay. (perked back up) Well, it is nothing I am not used to and I will just need to rise the ranks here.

 

Leila: Tragedeigh, they're actually really impressed with you, but they don't want to take you away from where you are a hometown hero.

 

 

Tragedeigh: (singing) I can understanding / Not wanting Mrs. Weather / But if I were a villain / Would it make it better?

 

Leila: Probably not, no. 

 

 

Perry Payne: Hey boss lady, what about me and my boy Gil here? We been cravin to get into that tag team race over there.

 

Leila: You two are also still going. They were impressed with how quickly you jumped in and filled the necessary spot, and they are looking for tag teams.

 

Perry: Yooooo hell yeah that's what I'm talking about.

 

 

Gilbert Glass: Right and tight.

 

Gilbert and Perry double-pound their fists together.

 

Leila: Now for the rest of you, I feel badly that this has played out this way, so we're going to enter you all into the Inferno Rumble.  

 

Emma: (flatly) You mean the one that the entire roster is in? How kind and generous of you. 

 

Leila: That also means you have roster spots here and we're rising as an organization. And I'm going to end the ban on ringside accompaniment. I've learned it's not worth it to attempt to rein your craziness in. But all disqualification rules are still in effect. Now get back out there and kick ass!

 

INT. ARENA SECTION - CONTINUOUS

 

Colin and Bianca sit at the desk.

 

 

Colin: So this has been a disappointing turn of events for many of our competitors, but I can't say it's entirely surprising given the actions of that whole group.

 

Bianca: But this has put a much bigger target on the backs of Daria Donner and the Manifestation, and I have to say I agree with Kalpana that Donner should have been equally consequenced and even if Thunder didn't sway the pot at all it's undoubtedly her connection to him that's keeping her contract alive. It's a miscarriage of justice. 

 

Colin: It's all about who you know I guess.

 

Bianca: Well, one person whose contract was pulled without having been involved in this insanity is about to fight, and you saw how quickly her despair turned to resolve so I feel for anyone about to step in the ring with her. Ash?

 

Ash stands in the middle of the ring with Andra Jones. 

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

The drum riff hits to the instrumental version of Nothing But Thieves "Trip Switch" hits as three lightning bolts shoot from an image of the Manx three-leg symbol done as gears. The lights give a flickering feeling, as if power surging. Unlike her typical motions, Tamara has a mic in her hand and she looks determined and more than a little annoyed.

 

 

Ash: First, from Onchan, Isle of Man, TAMARA RIVERS!

 

Tamara: Cut the music. Cut the music. I am not sure how much of this you have seen or heard but because of actions of which I had no part, many of our contracts were reviewed and we are no longer going to the Path.

 

The crowd boos.

 

Tamara: I agree. This is the bullshit. And I thought there would be the tears, and that would have been okay too, never let anyone tell you that the crying this is not a good thing, but instead I am feeling the resolve. Yes. For you see, now I am here with you. I am here with the Maniacal Action Wrestling League, and I have the determination to be the absolute top of your roster. So the person who faces me today, I warn you this, I have much of the aggression to take out, and much of the frustration. And so do not take this personal what I am about to do to you.

 

Bianca: Well it's nice of her to warn us.

 

Colin: There are several competitors who have received this news, and I wouldn't want to stand across any of them right now, Bianca.

 

The lights go green and the projection of a giant eye illuminates the ramp. "Under My Umbrella" by Incubus plays as Iris Correa walks out in her scrubs and high-fives audience members.

 

 

Ash: And her opponent, from Denver, Colorado, the Eye-Con, Iris Correa!

 

Colin: Don't do it, Iris! It's a trap!

 

The bell rings and not even a second lapses before Tamara starts throwing hands.

 

Bianca: And Tamara Rivers driving fist after fist after fist into the face of Iris! Takedown and unloading with both fists! Iris is trying to parry and block but Tamara has fists flying in from all directions! I don't think I've ever seen her this aggravated! Slamming Iris's head into the mat now repeatedly. Deadlift up and powerbomb! Lift up and scoop slam! Pulls her up ripcord style and CHOKESLAM! Tamara picks her up by the neck and chokeslam again! Picks her up by the legs and Alabama Slam. 

 

Colin: At this point I can't tell if Tamara wants to win or decimate. 

 

Bianca: Either way Iris is unlikely to be getting up easily at the end of this.

 

Colin: Tamara with a guerilla press now and stomping out Iris! Iris is in serious trouble! Picks her up....SUPERKICK with her left leg! SUPERKICK with her right leg! Are we getting the...it's the third Superkick! TRISKELIOOOOON!

 

Bianca: She could easily go for the pin right now, but she chooses to drape Iris over her shoulder like a caveperson finding a mate! Brings her up to the top turnbuckle...wait, why are they turning around? CIRCUITBREAKER TO THE OUTSIDE! THAT WAS UNNECESSARY! She could have just finished her! 

 

1!

 

Colin: Driving her back into the ringpost! Now she throws her into the ring and gets a cover. 

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Tamara Rivers wins by Pinfall with the body slam into the ringpost!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, the Circuitbreaker, Tamara Rivers!

 

Bianca: An absolute razing to the ground by Tamara Rivers! Iris Correa is being helped to the back now that Tamara is leaving. 

 

Colin: And Cindy Sweet is about to take on Morgan Maverick! But Leila lifted the ban on ringside support, so who knows what the NorEaster is going to do. It's not even an if at this point. 

 

Ash enters the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for points towards the Round Robin!

 

Jimmy Eat World "Sweetness" plays as Cindy Sweet and Taylor Tekk come down the ramp. They're not doing their usual cutesy selfie-stick though, as Cindy Sweet is all business and Taylor is trailing behind her a little bit sheepishly.

 

 

Ash: First, accompanied by Taylor Tekk, from San Diego, California, CINDY SWEET!

 

Bianca: Who put the selfie-stick up Cindy's butt?

 

Colin: There's some obvious tension between Tekk and Sweet, Sweet feeling like she's carrying the team.

 

Bianca: She's not wrong.

 

Halestorm "Dirty Work" plays as Morgan Maverick walks out with Zora Luthor, both of them mocking the crowd as they walk down.

 

 

Ash: And her opponent! Accompanied by Zora Luthor, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, MORGAN MAVERICK!

 

Colin: Daria Donner not accompanying them. I think she left for the day. 

 

Bianca: It seems Kalpana actually succeeded in getting in her head.

 

The bell rings. Cindy Sweet and Morgan Maverick start by trading slaps across the face.

 

Bianca: And Maverick sends Sweet off the ropes, Sweet ducks and back around with a spinning wheel kick! Back off the ropes into a handstand moonsault splash! Sweet locks Maverick up in a headlock armbar, Maverick easily whips her off and picks her up by the hair, hair pull mat slam! Maverick with a snarky little chuckle now as she scoops Sweet up and scoop slams her down.

 

Colin: Sweet back up fairly easy and goes for the back wheel kick but Morgan evades. She probably didn't have enough momentum to really get that going. Sweet undeterred, leg trip into a single leg crab! Maverick struggling a bit but able to get her free leg to push Sweet off.

 

Bianca: I never understand why anyone leaves a limb free that has range on you, especially this early in a match. Morgan with a neckbreaker. Cindy Sweet bounces back up and Pele Kick! Sweet off the ropes and drilling Morgan Maverick with a spear! Goes for a cover!

 

1!

 

Colin: Morgan lifts her off and is bench pressing her! And launches her back. Sweet takes a tumble but gets to her feet. Morgan charges Sweet but Sweet catches Morgan in a Bitter End! Zora goes fishing under the ring, and she has caught the ire of Andra. Cindy trying not to pay too much attention to that, sends Morgan off the ropes, I think she may be going for the Cake Pop here and WHOA what is Emma Janeer doing here??

 

 

Colin: Emma Janeer with the low blow kick on Taylor Tekk on the outside and THAT caught Cindy's attention! Cindy distracted now and MORGAN MAVERICK DRILLS CINDY SWEET WITH A POLISH HAMMER TO THE BACK! Andra turn around!!

 

Bianca: Andra and Zora are really getting into the nitty gritty of their argument and oh come on! What is Lily Martin doing here now?

 

 

Colin: Zora distracting Andra, Maverick goes for the pin and Emma's got her feet on the ropes! Lily in the ring!

 

1! 2! 3! 

 

Bianca: Lily Martin technically has not had her referee duties officially stripped from her, so for all intents and purposes, that's a legal count!

 

Morgan Maverick wins by Pinfall with the Polish Hammer and assisted pin!

 

 

Lily: Here is your winner and awarded three points, The Philly Phirebrand, MORRRRRRRRRRRGAN MAAAAAAAAVERICK!

 

Bianca: And we knew that the NorEaster was going to stick themselves into this. 

 

Colin: Looks like the fireworks aren't over yet.

 

 

Emma Janeer enters the ring. 

 

Emma: If you would all stop booing and whining for a second, I got something to say to you. Broadway Bloom, I didn't want to admit it, but you were right. Good always wins was a stupid fairy tale. Earlier today, my contract for Path was ripped away from me because I had to be Kalpana's friend, for the actions I took blinded by friendship and loyalty and doing the right thing. Today I finally learned to take what's mine, and already I feel the difference. The Powerslam Princess had her contract taken away, but the Reflection of Perfection is going to be enjoying her brand new 5th Avenue Penthouse, thanks to my new benefactors in the NorEaster. That's right, the Princess days are done.

 

Emma reveals a new singlet that reads "Imogen" and sets her old one on fire.

 

 

Emma/Imogen: Emma Janeer is dead. Long live Imogen. And to mark the occasion...

 

Imogen, Morgan Maverick, Zora Luthor, and Lily Martin hoist Cindy Sweet up and wreck her with the 4Play Powerbomb. Halestorm "Dirty Work" plays while they sneer over the fallen Cindy Sweet and raise their hands together, then leave the ring. All except Lily pull out new Noreaster jackets and put them on, indicating the team is formed.

 

 

Bianca: Well, it looks like the NorEaster is here to stay. But we've received word that Broadway Bloom will be unable to return, and has decided to step away from the ring.

 

Colin: And the newly christened Imogen still has her fight for later on. I have to say, both Tamara and Imogen are making lemonade out of lemons here. Tamara deciding that her next step is to take the division by storm, and now Imogen using the opportunity to become more fully grown. But right now, our newest staff member Cristel Bassano is backstage interviewing for our next match. Welcome Cristel!

 

INT. BACKSTAGE - CONTINUOUS

 

CRISTEL BASSANO walks backstage for her first interview. 

 

 

Cristel: Thanks Colin and Bianca! I'm here just awaiting the next interview who should be walking down any-

 

The lights go out.

 

Cristel: Minute. Great. Of all the time to lose power.

 

A glowing red mask appears, and holding it is revealed to be Ann "Atomic" Lee whose smile is disturbing.

 

 

Ann: So. You're the little lamb they hired to replace me. 

 

Cristel: ...Ann! Hi! I wasn't expecting-

 

Ann walks toward Cristel, not losing the smile but the walk gives the vibe of sniffing out a gazelle. 

 

Ann: What? Me to still be here? Me to not be locked up in some looney bin somewhere? Well I have news for you Cristel Bassano, and for EVERYONE here at MAWL. You see, I thought I would be following Rade to glory and instead they decided to keep us here. So that means you will continue to see my face everywhere you go. You will learn to be haunted by my face. You will learn to tremble at my voice. Because I am the herald of the Blood Collector, and there is always blood uncollected anywhere you go. We are not unnerved by this turn of events and we will continue to feast and destroy for as long as we are here. All this means is that safety is a dashed expectation, a beached whale on the shores of truth, a delicious delusion. We WILL destroy everything you love, we WILL break everyone you cheer, and it is not for spite and resentment and revenge. It is in further service to our mission. We collect the blood. We share the blood. Nothing more and nothing less. 

 

Ann's maniacal laugh echoes as the mask appears to short out, leaving the lights dark again. When the lights come back on, Ann is gone and Cristel is left alone.

 

Cristel: Back to you. 

 

ARENA SECTION - CONTINUOUS

 

Colin and Bianca sit at the microphone, while Ash and Andra stand in the ring.

 

 

Colin: Thank you Cristel.

 

Bianca: It's weird to see Ann like this. Do you think she'll come out of it?

 

Colin: She seems...happy...in her new role. But I guess time will tell.

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

The lights are black. Like black black. "Mitternacht" by e nomine plays and all that can be seen is the smiley faces which also glow on the poles facing into the ring. Rade lifts Ann up and Ann extends her arms and lifts her head in a Messiah pose as Rade steps over the ring. Once they get into the ring he closes his hands around his face to cover the mask then spits the blood mist into the air, which Ann showers in using the same Messiah pose. The lights go on.

 

 

Ash: First, accompanied by Ann "Atomic" Lee, from deep in the Black Forest, weighing in at 355 pounds, Der Blutsammler, RADE!

 

 

The next man comes out to pink lights with little projections of sprinkles to the ring, with a donut painted on his chest and offering donuts to people, to the song System of a Down "Sugar". This is Sprinkl.

 

 

Ash: And his opponent, from Boston, Massachusetts, weighing in at 211 pounds, SPRINKL!

 

The bell rings.

 

Ann: Collect...the blood.

 

Bianca: And Ann directing her new charge. Rade seems to be listening and picks Sprinkl up, now I think his mask is metal if I'm not mistaken and drives his head into Sprinkl's face! And again! And he's picking up speed with this! Oh! I know what this is! He calls this "Gesichtsmoerder" or Face Killer in German! Which means he won't stop until he's put down or Sprinkl becomes a jelly donut!

 

Colin: And it won't take long! Er ist ein Berliner! Sprinkl is already starting to bleed and Rade is not yet satisfied and the blood really coming down now! NOW Rade seems satisfied and tosses Sprinkl in the air, which means we know what's coming next, YEP there's the chokeslam drive down, and a firm hand placed on Sprinkl's chest for the pin.

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Rade wins by Pinfall with the 7 Feet Under!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, RADE!

 

Rade and Ann leave the ring. Sprinkl waits a second to get up until he sees that Rade is gone.

 

Colin: Sprinkl is smart to wait a moment to get out.

 

Bianca: Now that Sprinkl has left the ring and our patented self-cleaning mats are taking care of the blood, we can safely call the next match. Ash?

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

A cheerful man engages the crowd in a slow "wave your hands in the air" to the tune of Trik Turner "Friends and Family" as he walks to the ring. This is Greg Arias.

 

 

Ash: First, from Boise, Idaho, weighing in at 301 pounds, Good Dude Greg Arias!

 

The lights give a stained-glass like feeling as the colors rotate. The instrumental of "CASTLE OF GLASS" by Linkin Park plays and as the drums hit, Gil and Perry stand on the center of the stage and pound fists which causes two thin pillars of sparks to arise. They strut down the ramp, giving pump up shouts to the fans who cheer them back. Occasionally they pound a fist each of a fan. When they enter the ring, they both do the square hand smash in synchronicity, then scream and pillars of sparks go off in the ring.

 

 

Ash: And his opponent! Accompanied by Unrelenting Perry Payne, from Neenah, Wisconsin, weighing in at 291 pounds, "Unbreakable" Gilbert Glass!

 

Bianca: Perry not taking any chances this time. We know that Arias isn't going to do anything but Landon Gentry and his sleazy little minstrel have had it out for these two, and that's bound to increase with them going to Path and Landon's ride making its unexpected last stop here.

 

The bell rings. Gilbert and Greg shake hands and square off.

 

Colin: A great show of sportsmanship to start the match. Glass locks up with Arias, a bit of power struggle and Arias takes the win with a suplex. Glass back up and Arias gets Glass in a headlock and spinning toe hold. Glass with a quick roll out of the way and then up he goes into a quick lariat.

 

Bianca: Where Payne is a passionate man with fire in his belly, Glass remains cool as ice and you can see in his demeanor that he's keeping his nose down and his head in the game. He has Arias in an armbar now and Arias reaching for the ropes, which causes Glass to let go. Glass with the Irish Whip and Arias comes back with a shoulder tackle! Arias back off the ropes and a splash! Glass kicks up before a 1 count. Arias hooks Glass up and a spinning neckbreaker! Arias hits a leg drop! Off the ropes and a running frog splash! Arias is picking up momentum, but he would be wise to stay on Glass rather than running back this much and this is exactly what I mean, Glass this time catches Arias with a leg drag, Arias lands but bounces himself pretty quickly but Glass has the momentum and an arm drag oh okay they're trading arm drags and Arias ends the exchange with a knee smash! Arias picks Glass up and fallaway slam! 

 

Colin: Glass is showing the unbreakable moniker has some heft to it, he's just bouncing up from these moves with little show of struggle. Anyone else would be showing frustration but Arias is just rolling with it and catches Glass with a running forearm. Glass kips up into a Pele kick! Glass tends not to favor these flashier moves but once in a while he'll surprise you. Arias taken back a step but grabs Glass up for a bearhug and NO Glass with a bell clap and gets himself free! And Glass gets his elbows in formation and RIGHT ON TOP of Arias's head! Arias just entered the Hard Hat Zone! And Glass off the ropes loading up the punch and ARIAS CATCHES HIM INTO A ROCK BOTTOM! Narrowly avoids the Glass Cannon! 

 

Bianca: Arias off the ropes looking for that Split Leg and Glass rolls out of the way! What would have been a Spread Cheer now just looks like Split Pea Soup! Glass bends Arias back Matrix style and CURB STOMP TO THE FACE! Arias takes a Gil Pill! Gilbert Glass with the cover now!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Gilbert Glass wins by Pinfall with the Gil Pill!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, Unbreakable Gilbert Glass!

 

Colin: And Glass helping Arias up and a quick hug! And a single fist bump as Gilbert leaves. The double bump is reserved for Perry but a true class act in the ring is Gilbert Glass. 

 

Gilbert, Perry, and Greg exit the ring to cheers. 

 

Bianca: And now we're down to the last four matches of today, which is relieving, today has been a lot to take in.

 

Colin: A big part of that will be fighting next. Emma Janeer has decided to throw herself into a new way of doing things, and we're about to see what that looks like. Ash?

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

Halestorm "Dirty Work" plays as Imogen (pink hair) walks out, flanked by Zora Luthor (blonde) and Morgan Maverick (brunette) in their matching NorEaster jackets, with Lily Martin in a NorEaster referee shirt. They mock the audience as they come down. Zora holds a microphone.

 

 

Zora: Ash, shut up and listen because you're just going to mess this up again.

 

The crowd boos this.

 

Zora: Quiet Midwestern Mids, your superior in every way has the floor. Accompanied by the Hottest CEO under 30 Zora Luthor and the Phabulous Philly Phirebrand Morgan Maverick, from her 5th Ave Penthouse Suite in New York City, the Reflection of Perfection, IMOGEN! You can announce the other person now as it doesn't matter if you mess that up because my girl here will anyway.

 

DNCE "Cake by the Ocean" starts and Sugar Cooki stands on stage on the microphone and walks down to the ring as she talks.

 

 

Sugar: YOOOO!!!! Fellow East Coasters! You got a spot for your girl here? Cuz I'm Jersey Shore born and bred, let's ride together! NorEaster!!

 

Zora: Come on down to the ring, we'll give you a deal.

 

Colin: Oh I don't like this.

 

Bianca: Yeah, this feels like a trap.

 

Morgan Maverick holds the rope as Imogen and Zora Luthor hold a pink NorEaster jacket.

 

Zora: This jacket was meant to be for Daria Donner. But she was a little wimp-ass and ran away when her cousin's name was mentioned. So now we have an open spot, and Sugar Cooki, this can potentially be yours.

 

Sugar starts to approach the jacket, and Zora holds her hand out.

 

Zora: IF. 

 

Sugar: Yah bish, anything. I'm down to RIDE.

 

Zora: You throw this match.

 

Bianca: What?! Wait, what is she asking? 

 

Colin: You need this win, Sugar Cooki! Don't do this.

 

Sugar Cooki is taken aback. She looks around at the crowd, who are cheering "Don't Lie Down! Don't lie Down!" Lily, Morgan, and Imogen gesture to the mat. Sugar Cooki looks around again, then shrugs.

 

Sugar: It's the not the first time today I've been asked to be on my back, EEEEEY.

 

Sugar lays down and Imogen rests her elbow on Sugar, checking her nails as the crowd boos. Lily counts 1, 2, 3! 

 

Imogen wins by Pinfall with a thrown pin. 

 

 

Zora: Here is your winner and awarded three points, the Reflection of Perfection, IMOGEN! Oh, and Sugar Cooki?

 

Sugar Cooki looks hopeful for a moment.

 

Zora: Application denied.

 

Zora, Morgan, Imogen, and Lily do the mean girl pouty face in unison then pick Sugar Cooki off the ground for the 4Play Powerbomb.

 

Bianca: Yep, this is pretty much what we-

 

Bianca is cut off by the the first note of Jimmy Eat World "Sweetness." The audience sings the WHOOOA.

 

Colin: WAIT! THE CAVALRY IS HERE!

 

 

Colin: Cindy! Taylor! Sprinkl! Rushing the ring! The 4Play Powerbomb is interrupted, and Sugar Cooki joins them in throwing fists at the NorEaster! The NorEaster is retreating!

 

Sugar: Looks like it's a turf war then. Survivor series match tomorrow, ya gabootzes. 

 

Colin: Sugar Cooki was willing to lay down for the NorEaster, and now she's going to war with them! Tomorrow just got more insane. I'm not sure I can handle it.

 

Bianca: Speaking of not handling it-

 

Colin: You're always so good at transitions.

 

Bianca: Thank you. The next two competitors in this were both pretty devastated by the news their Path contracts were revoked so I'm curious how they're going to respond in the ring. Here we go now to figure it out. Ash?

 

Ash stands in the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and will count towards points in the Round Robin!

 

"Freedom" by Sparkle is playing but Kalpana clearly has an angry look on her face and doesn't feel much like giving the audience attention as she walks down to the ring. She has a microphone in her hand. 

 

 

Ash: First, from In-

 

Kalpana: I'm gonna stop you right there, Ash Greaves. Because I don't know if you're gonna get it right or get it wrong. Are you going to say Inurawa or Inaruwa which is where I'm actually from? And it's not just you, the damn graphic has my hometown wrong. Can you believe that? I come out here and I give you brand new shit, the likes of which you've never seen, and you can't even get my damn hometown right. You've been telling me all week that what I'm bringing isn't enough and I pushed back against it, but now Path 2 Glory you're out here saying that I'm not interesting enough? Kira Dain I can understand because who cares about the weather in Wyoming, wherever that is, but seriously? You all think I'm boring? Well, okay, change is coming and you're not gonna like it, and after I waste the weak little weatherwoman-

 

Kira Dain rushes the ring, all ready to fight.

 

 

The bell rings as Kira throws goes for a Lou Thesz and punches.

 

Colin: And we're off! Kira just going buck wild but Kalpana quickly reverses it and laying fist after fist into Kira's head, now slamming her head into the ground and dropping her forearms into Kira's face! She's just absolutely losing it! Kira ducking now and Kalpana with a gutwrench powerbomb. Kalpana with a spike piledriver! She's not even trying for innovation now she's just looking to hurt Kira Dain! The hardest irish whip, Kira collapsing into the corner. 

 

Bianca: Putting her into the reverse tree of woe, and pressing her face against the turnbuckle with the boot! Andra counting-

 

1!

2!

 

Bianca: Kalpana letting her foot off and then a STOMP! Running back and a baseball slide into the turnbuckle! Kalculator! Kalpana wrapping Kira in the ropes, and tarantula! She's strangling Kira with her legs! Andra counting again.

 

1!

2!

 

Colin: Kalpana mouthing off to the ref, Kira tries to swing at Kalpana but Kalpana ducks and rakes the eyes of Kira and short arm lariat! Moonsault Tombstone! Nepal Bearer! Going for the cover!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Kalpana wins by Pinfall with the Nepal Bearer! 

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner, and awarded three points, KALPANA!

 

Sparkle "Freedom" starts but the music stops as Kalpana hits Kira Dain with a chair and then puts her head between the flaps and stomps.

 

Kalpana: Later losers.

 

Kalpana leaves as Kira tries to get up.

 

Colin: And Kalpana makes an unfortunate turn. I guess we're going to see what this new way is all about. In the meantime, we are down to our final two matches of the day

 

Ann stands in the middle of the ring.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin.

 

Habitually Henry "Capybara" plays as Capybara pops up and down in the audience before flipping into the ring. 

 

 

Ash: First! From Bang Phra, Thailand, weighing 201 pounds, CAPYBARA!

 

The mall turns into a full on dance floor with smoke machine and laser show as Deorro Feat. Elvis Crespo "Baillar" plays. The audience engages in the dancing and out comes Neon Juan busting various moves. He grinds, flexes his abs at various members of the audience and flirts with anyone of an adult age as he walks down the arena. He smells of intense cologne. He uses the turnbuckle pole as a dancer pole for a moment then shakes his chest on the top turnbuckle as he takes off his vest.

 

 

Ash: First, from La Santa, Mexico, weighing 235 pounds, El Divertido, Neon Juan Guyverno!

 

The bell rings.

 

Colin: Aaaand Juan is leaving.

 

Juan: I am not going to the Path and now you have me to be fighting a rodent? I will not do this.

 

1!

 

Colin: Capybara could just let Juan leave. But no! He's coming after him! The count restarts!

 

1!

 

Bianca: Capybara trying to drag him back into the ring, and Juan pushing back! And swings at him with a quick but solid punch.

 

2!

 

Bianca: Capybara ducks him and fireman carry. Capybara with a deadlift suplex! 

 

3!

 

Colin: Get back to the ring Capybara! Juan with a headstand headscissors takedown!

 

4!

 

Bianca: Capybara seems a bit turned around, spinning powerslam onto the ramp!

 

5!

 

Colin: Maybe Capybara is deciding to let Juan get counted out after all and setting him up to not move. Capybara starting to walk back to the ring and Juan springs into a tackle!

 

6!

 

Colin: Capybara getting to his feet now and Juan whips him into the barricade!

 

7!

 

Bianca: Juan could take this match if he can get back to the ring in time! Starts to jog ring-ways!

 

8!

 

Colin: Capybara charges him and gets him with the chop block!

 

9!

 

Bianca: He's gonna have to run if he wants to make it for that last second. Can he-no. 

 

10.

 

The match goes to a double count-out.

 

Ash: The match has been declared a double count-out, and each competitor will be awarded one point.

 

Colin: You hate to see it go that way. The fans aren't too pleased either. Hopefully our last match will be better than this. 

 

The yell "SCHMETTERLIIIIIIING" rings through the arena as the lights go out. The fans go nuts.

 

Bianca: I think we can assume it will be, here comes the Champ!

 

Schmetterling walks out to Rammstein "Mein Herz Brennt" with a mini flamethrower that he shoots in the sky whenever "BRENNT" is yelled.

 

 

Ash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and will count towards points in the Round Robin! First, from Mellrichstadt, Germany, weighing in at 219 pounds, the MAWL Champion, SCHMETTERLIIIIIIING! And his opponent-

 

Ash is interrupted as trumpets blare and a red carpet comes down. The minstrel enters first, followed by flower bearers, and begins to sing to the tune of a madrigal and play his lute. As he does so, Landon Gentry walks in behind him, in full Redcoat Regalia.

 

 

Minstrel: O Come, O Come, Tell ye a Tale, of a Champion in the making/ the pain he will bring to the riff-raff in ring/ the win is his for the taking/ if you stand in his way the tax you will pay by way of pain beyond your worst fears/ So lay down for pin and give him the wind or you will leave here in tears. 

 

Ash: From Scunthorpe England, Landon Gentry.

 

The Minstrel continues to strum his lute to the same tune. The flower bearers approach the ring and use their hands to create a stepstool on which Landon steps and enters the ring. He waves in the flower bearers who take off his robe to reveal a bare chest. He puts his fists up as if to engage in fisticuffs and donnybrooks. The bell rings.

 

Bianca: And the bell rings, Gentry starts the match with a slap across Schmetterling's face. Schmetterling responds with a punch! Schmetterling throws him off the ropes and meets him back in the middle with a high knee. Schmetterling showing some Muay Thai kick combos and really a bit more variation, I can't say I am complaining though. Gentry charges and flapjack by Schmetterling to catch him! Schmetterling mounts and throwing some axe handles. 

 

Colin: Gentry with some difficulty catches the arms and turns the axe-handle into a leg-locked armbar. Schmetterling gets up fairly easily and back into a tie-up, Gentry going for a sleeper but Schmetterling reverses into a jawbreaker!  Schmetterling with a snap suplex and Gentry rolls outside to catch his breath.

 

1!

 

Bianca: Gentry slides himself back into the ring, and take-down into alternating slaps. Gentry with a jumping elbow drop and now hitting Schmetterling with stomps. Gentry picks Schmetterling up and drags him into a mid-stomach boot. Gentry getting the chant of "Wanker" now, and he's getting a bit of frustration! Looking to take it out on the champ, charging in with quick punches, throws Schmetterling into the corner and going for a foot choke. 

 

Colin: Letting up, backing up, European Uppercut. Schmetterling struggling a bit, Landon Irish whip to the other corner and going for another European uppercut, but Schmetterling hits a somersault powerbomb and goes for the roll-up!

 

1!

2!

 

Bianca: Landon kicks up, and throwing boots to Schmetterling's midsection.  Schmetterling struggling again, Landon going for a stomp and no one home! He slams his foot into the ground, Schmetterling with a rocket kick! Picking him up now, BUTTERFLY PILEDRIVER!

 

1!

2!

3!

 

Schmetterling wins by Pinfall with the Butterfly Piledriver!

 

 

Ash: Here is your winner and awarded three points, SCHMETTERLIIIIING!

 

Colin: And we end on a strong note to this continued insanity! We are now officially halfway through this event, and done with this week.

 

Bianca: A lot of turns to the dark, I wonder how that will play out as we continue on and MAWL writ large. 

 

Colin: In the meantime, here are our new rankings:

 

 

Colin: The women's division continues to be a tale of two halves, with half of the group right on the top. 

 

Bianca: Whereas the men's division is starting to separate a bit. Taylor Tekk just can't get it together and you can feel the seething in Cindy Sweet. 

 

Colin: Anything can happen. And as we've learned anything probably will. Come back next week, and we'll see exactly what that means. I'm Colin McRae.

 

Bianca: And I'm Bianca Diaz. Take care everyone!

 

FADE TO BLACK.